Motherhood

  I wrote down a couple things yesterday but right now at this moment I will not be using them because I'm just lazy to get it out my car.
  Plus I'm about to take a bath.
 Here is a few words

 I Woke up to only have baby ready to get up and I knew I wasn't going back to sleep.
 I made some coffee that got me up a little.
Had to think of something to do for the sabbath( I figure that out) to where I started to think about a whole bunch of shit.

  Do I have time with my kids? My oldest want to do something on Sundats..has I work every fucking Sunday. Do I get a new job...looked trying to figure out what works and who will be more flexible.
  Do they pay enough...benefits..all times of questions started to go through my head that I started to get angry.
  So I try to focus on the importance of today which is Yah. It's his day and I need to be in his word.
  I have to remind myself my goals..my passion and what if at times.
  I'm not going to lie I want to give up. Throw in the towel and say F it.

  But you see I can't do that. I'm not a quitter and it's not in my blood. If you have kids deal with it. Meaning do what you can and try not to bring yourself down.
  Yes it sucks some days but at least you have a reason to live. It's easy to leave and fail but it's harder to stay and be responsible for anything.
  So people have dogs to start off with but I realize they will never leave the house only if I take them.
  Cats..well they seem o simple that I wobt mind having one.
  Kids well I have no choice there..THEY ARE HERE.

  LOL sorry that was funny to me
 But real talk try not to listen to society and what they expect of you. All that matters is what Yah feels.
  There will come a time in are life where we have to stand accountable for every single action and all I can say is darn I hope my sins are forgiven.

  Okay maybe I went of the wall but back to focusing.


  Yes you might not have shot but keep going anyways.

School is around the corner for the kids..haaaaahhh

  The moment of truth is I have a couple more days until my kids go back to school. Unsure if I should feel excited or get ready for a crazy year full of activities and running around. Plus keeping up with all that goes on in school is hard enough and my kids work can really be alot. Being organized some days suck for me but I can do this.
  With a extra one she will have to be learned ingredients as well while she grows I will be making sure I stay organize as best as I can

  If you are single like me hold on to your seats and but on a smile. Make sure you walk like you are the Boss and do what you do.